writing

More Tips for Addressing “Too Much Dialogue”

A turned back gives a different feeling than 2 friends facing each other

Here are some more tips for addressing “too much dialogue” in your MS. You can also check out my previous post on this. And I found very helpful this post showing 8 dialogue problems and how to fix them by Louise Hornby and this post on how to fix common dialogue problems by Kristen Lamb/Alex Limberg. I started blogging because I took Kristen Lamb’s blogging course, so I highly recommend following her blog.

  • Add Beats to Tie Dialogue to Setting and Convey Character
  • Add Setting Filtered through Emotions
  • Add Setting that Conveys Characterization

Add Beats to Tie Dialogue to Setting and Convey Character

“Beats are the bits of action interspersed through a scene, such as a character walking to a window or removing his glasses and rubbing his eyes. . . usually they involve physical gestures, although a short passage of interior monologue can also be considered a sort of internal beat.”

Self-Editing for Writers, by Renni Browne and Dave King, at p. 143.

So, beats “allow you to vary the pace of your dialogue” and to “tie your dialogue to your setting and character.” Id. at 144-146. I realized that in the initial drafts of my WIP, there would be pages of dialogue without any mention of place. So even just a descriptive sentence about the setting (using smell or taste) helps give the reader the sense of where they are.

Also, beats are “a powerful way to convey your characters.” Id. at 151. The examples in Self-Editing for Writers (one of my go-to craft books) show you how to do it. They explain that the beats “give a feel for the pauses in the conversation.” Id. at p. 149. Beats can deepen the emotional content. Id. at 157.

As they state,

The best way to fine-tune the rhythm of your dialogue, of course, is to read it aloud. Listen for the pauses as you read, and if you find yourself pausing between two consecutive lines, consider inserting a beat at that point.”

Self-Editing for Writers by Renni Browne and Dave King, at p. 151.

If it’s a quick repartee, however, don’t add beats, which will be distracting and lessen the tension.

Add Setting Filtered Through Emotions

NYC at dusk

Add setting, but through the character’s view point and emotional state. Is the character happy? Then the descriptions of setting should be upbeat.

As the writing guru Swain writes, “present[] your material subjectively, as your focal character receives it.” Techniques of the Selling Writer by Dwight V. Swain at p. 47. This book is another go-to writing craft book. My teacher Linnea Sinclair recommended it. (It is dry to read, though).

Add Setting that Conveys Characterization

“Don’t give the reader a Better Homes and Gardens description of the heroine’s apartment. Tell her that the week’s mail is piled on the kitchen table beside a dying philodendron or that the clothes she picked up from the cleaners last week are still hanging on the treadmill in her bedroom. These are details that characterize as well as create visual images.”

Writing with Emotion, Tension & Conflict by Cheryl St. John, at p. 125-126.

Let’s Talk: Do you have more tips for addressing “too much dialogue”?

So, do you have any tips for addressing too much dialogue?

I hope you are all doing as well as can be. We visited the beach as a family for our second time out in 6 weeks.

Fire Island, New York

We had “snow” (!) last week in New York City, although it melted by the time it hit the ground. Today, the sun is shining. If you go out, most people are wearing masks. I ventured out to the pharmacy, the bank and the post office (this is my first time going into stores since March 13). CVS (the pharmacy) was a bit like the game PacMan where you’d turn to go down an aisle, see a person and then back out to choose a different person-free aisle to go down.

Anyway, thanks for reading!

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